The Nobel Committee has decided to confer the next year’s Nobel Prize for Literature to Sheldon Blooper, a California-based gentleman, for spotting a typo in the latest issue (NSFW) of the Paper magazine, whose cover captures Kim Kardashian in, uh, a rear rare frame of mind.
(Image via Gawker.com)
“I know you guys are wondering how spotting a typo qualifies for a Nobel for Literature,” said Swedish Academy chairman, Peter Englund. “But when you think about it, you’ve got Kim Kardashian first trying to balance a cup on her posterior, then baring it all in an attempt to break in the internet and then…” Englund trailed off, seeming lost for a while, before suddenly snapping back to reality. “Sorry, what was I saying?”
According to sources, after the feat was nominated for Nobel, judges sat down with copies of the issue of the magazine, in order to verify if Blooper had indeed corrected the typo. But after several hours, when none of the comittee members could go past the cover, they decided to award him the Nobel anyway, and quickly dispersed with their copy of the issue.
“This guy deserves to be knighted,” Englund added. “We’ve sent a proposal to her majesty, seeking the same. Not only has he read the words in the issue, but he has actually spotted a typo! The highest possible honor for this guy, is to be officially anointed God, but for the moment, he deserves nothing less than the Nobel for litereture.”
When The UnReal Times rang up Blooper and asked if he thought he deserved the prize, he said, “I think I’ve done more than that Obama chap, and they gave him the Nobel peace prize. So yeah, I sure deserve it,” thereby shutting us up effectively.
Meanwhile, Paper magazine, has offered Blooper the job of their literary editor. “This guy’s work ethic is unparalleled. He found a typo in an issue that even I haven’t read yet. He’s truly a godsend,” editor Mickey Boardman said. Sources also added that The Times of India is on the brink of cancelling its deal with The Huffington Post and has reached out to Paper for partnership talks.
PS: How many of you noticed the two (intentional) typos we made in this piece in the 3rd and 4th paras? And the pic is not even NSFW!